Jumping from
the Mausoleum
Janet Kuypers
3/10/16
When I was young
I sang at our church,
and as a female teen
I was a little peeved
that I could never
become a priest.
But as a teenager
with nothing to do,
one night
me and a few friends
went to the local cemetery
once it got dark, brought along
a couple of white sheets.
Now, this was
a small cemetery
in a small town,
it didn’t have
high fences or gates.
So, we just walked
into the graveyard at night,
and we waited
by the mausoleum
until we saw a car
coming down the long road
from a distance.
That’s when
I’d get on the roof,
throw a sheet over my body,
and when the car
would get closer,
just as it was making
a turn near the cemetery,
that’s when I’d jump
to the ground
in the darkness.
My arms were out;
I was covered
with a white sheet.
And we’d laugh,
wondering if they thought
they’d seen a ghost.
I mean,
this is what
we’d do for fun,
teenagers with nothing to do
in the middle of nowhere.
But my dad
heard what happened,
and he asked me
the next morning
if I knew anything
about what happened
at the cemetery the night before.
I don’t even remember
what I answered,
but as far as I know,
we weren’t doing
anything illegal,
no one was hurt...
And it’s still kind of funny
to imagine
how those drivers reacted,
wondering what they saw
when they were driving
down a lonely road
by a cemetery;
did the think
they saw a spirit.
Ah well,
the church didn’t want
a female priest.
I suppose
it’s for the best
that the church
wasn’t suited for me.
I had more fun
making people
look toward the dead
and question what they see.
| 
