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live in Death ‘n’ Rebirth 07/11/10 at Beach Poets
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of the full Death ‘n’ Rebirth 07/11/10 show at Beach Poets, from archive.org
PDF download the free chapbook Death ‘n’ Rebirth
with all of the writing in the live show
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Watch this YouTube video
11/23/10, live at the Café in Chicago
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See YouTube video
of Kuypers reading this poem 4/8/13 at the Frankenstone art center in Chicago (Sony)
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of Kuypers reading this poem 4/8/13 at the Frankenstone art center in Chicago (Canon)
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See YouTube video
of Kuypers performing poetry including this poem in a poetry reading as she was called the “Headliner” 4/8/13 at Chicago’s Frankenstone art center (Sony)
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See YouTube video
of Kuypers performing poetry including this poem in a poetry reading as she was called the “Headliner” 4/8/13 at Chicago’s Frankenstone art center (Canon)
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See YouTube video
of Janet Kuypers reading her poem Left with a Hole live 9/18/13 at the open mic the Café Gallery in Chicago (C)
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See YouTube video
of Janet Kuypers reading her poem Left with a Hole live 9/18/13 at the open mic the Café Gallery in Chicago (S)
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See YouTube video
of Janet Kuypers reading her poem Jumping from the Skyline to the Clouds in Nashville 10/26/13 in her Nashville Halloween feature
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See YouTube video
of Janet Kuypers reading her “Periodic Table” poems (and two original songs) live in her Chicago 10/20/13 feature Nashville Halloween feature, including this writing
Nashville Halloween feature chapbook
Download this free chapbook of the
Nashville Halloween feature,
w/ Tag Team and Periodic Table poems in this show.
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See YouTube video
of Janet Kuypers reading 3 poems, Left with a Hole, “So”, & Scratch the Surface from her book let me see you Stripped, 1/17/16 at the Austin open mic Kick Butt Poetry (Canon Power Shot).
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See YouTube video
of Janet Kuypers reading 3 poems, Left with a Hole, “So”, & Scratch the Surface from her book let me see you Stripped, 1/17/16 at the Austin open mic Kick Butt Poetry (Nikon CoolPix S7000).

Left with a Hole

Janet Kuypers
07/05/10

you ever see tee vee shows, or in the movies
how some protagonist would fall into a coma
i don’t know from what, a gun shot, a car crash

well, every time they wake up from their coma
and they’re under from like four weeks to four years
they come to and they’re mentally just fine

they talk in complete sentences,
and they remember what happened to them
right up until the catastrophe

But let me be the voice of experience
in the real world, that’s not the way it goes
you don’t remember what happened right before

the coma began, you’ll wake up confused
because your long-term memory never got the chance
to save your short-term memories from that fateful day

when you wake up, you’ll have to train yourself
to walk and talk and eat again
you’ll fall out of your hospital bed trying to leave

you’ll want to kill the people who did this to you
you’ll want to scream your story to the world
as they put you in restraints at night

you know, for your own protection

you’ll want to rip that food tube out of you,
but you’ll be afraid to put food in your mouth.
look, you’ll have to remind yourself

that you’ve done this before, it’s not hard, everyone does it
put some food on a fork, put it in your mouth,
remove fork, start chewing, and just swallow.

I know it seems strange, but you can do this.

you have to build your life again, piece by piece,
I mean, you did this from scratch when you were a baby,
you’re an adult now, you can retrain yourself

people will ask you if you remember what happened to you
that fateful day, and they’ll think it’s just like the movies
and everyone just snaps out of their coma good as new

you won’t know how to tell them
that you’ll never be as good as new
and nothing you can say will make them understand

that even though you woke up,
those bastards who did this to you, they took so much
that you can’t even remember

the seconds before your life was forever changed for the worse.
you’re left with a hole. they even took your memories
of the last seconds of your life from you


Copyright © 2010 Janet Kuypers.

All rights reserved. No material
may be reprinted without express permission.

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