[the Writing of Kuypers]    [JanetKuypers.com]    [Bio]    [Poems]    [Prose]

Pioneer It amazes me that the the first definition of pioneer is a person or group that originates or helps open up a new line of thought or activity or a new method of technical development and that the second definition of pioneer is merely one of the first to settle in a territory To pioneer is to open or prepare for others to follow You said you all were pioneers. What did you know of these uncharted lands? And more importantly, why did you bring your old and tired ideas with you? How, with all of that spiritual baggage, could you plan to start anew? And what were you running from? Yes, pioneers, you were all so brave. So bold. Running away to a land that promised not to give you more but promised to not be where you were running from. Running away, taking all of your old edicts with you, all of your old theories, hoping a change of scenery was all you needed to make everything better. How can you start anew when all you do is move your problems to a different place? Yes, pioneers, you were all so brave. So bold. But you, Laura, you were only a little girl, what could you be crusading for? Were you following your heart, your mind, were you searching for the truth, did you know what it was you were looking for? Or were you even looking for something at all? Were you merely trying to survive it all, blindly following your powerful father, your powerful god? What were you a pioneer of? Did you feel the cold slap of wind from the barren plains and think that this was freedom? When you ran outside and played make-believe wearing your little dress, little ribbons in your hair did that cold gust of wind on your calves circling around and above your knees make you feel free from the journey your edlers forced you to take? When slaves were bought and sold when women were purchased for harems they had no say over where their masters roamed they merely had to follow and keep their mouths shut and did you feel that way too? To pioneer is to open or prepare for others to follow To you, your daddy was a pioneer but think about it again think about how alone you felt in the plains, making up stories to pass the time how sometimes you would go out to the fields and run, and run, and run hurdling forward until you couldn’t see your little house anymore and was this your moment of sanity? Was this what kept you alive? I know we’ve all felt that feeling before after being on vacation or just being somewhere else and knowing you have to leave you have to go home and be the person everyone expects you to be be the fearful little girl instead of the alive little girl And I know each and every one of us has felt that feeling while going home once wondering if it was possible to just never come back And you would run, and run, and run hurdling forward until you couldn’t see your little house anymore looking for something new then always finding only more and more plains You were too young to create something new to truly be a pioneer so you knew you’d have to go back you couldn’t keep running and you’d have to accept the world that was handed down to you And after running through those endless fields I’m sure that slow walk back to the house because you knew your mother would be calling you back for dinner I’m sure that slow walk back was all the more painful When I was little I would save up all my change and tell my mother I was going for a bike ride in the neighborhood And I would sneak over to the local ice cream parlor, even though I shouldn’t eat sweets before dinner And did you sneak off to the general store for penny candy Was this your freedom, was this your rebellion? Was this your decision to accept your own ideas and not those of your mother, your father, your god? Was this your attempt to get away from following? Was this your moment of sanity? Was this what kept you alive? To pioneer is to open or prepare for others to follow Was this what made you a pioneer? Copyright Janet Kuypers. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted without express permission.